Hardee har har

I must be really lame-o, because I'm finding myself to be hysterical this evening. Watch out. I found this little ditty I wrote last year when I was doing Lutheran Volunteer Corps, and thought I should share it with everybody. Or maybe I've posted this before...eh, so what? I can't believe I'd forgotten about the massage book....good gracious.

Here in Milwaukee (also called "The Good Land" or "Brew City", perhaps "The Land of Beer and Cheese"?), we’ve found some pretty interesting ‘treasures’ in our house. How they ever got here and why they’re STILL here remains a mystery.

–The creepy gargantuan plastic Santa face

–A book on massage, circa 1972. With such riveting chapters as, "What to Tell Your Friend", "Introduction to the Strokes", "Making up Your Own Strokes", "Nervousness, Discomfort and the Tickles", "Two on One", and your favorite and mine, "Your Animals Too". Seriously!

–The wealth of mattresses, end tables, and randomness in the basement; will it never end??!?

–The gawdy, I mean lovely and aesthetically-pleasing, banners made by past Dorothy Day’ers.

–Enough board games and books to entertain for HOURS, DAYS, heck MONTHS on end.


Interesting things in our neighborhood:

–The 80 or so people who come and go from the house across the street. Hello??!? Can we say drug dealers???

–The old school ice cream truck. Funny, I’ve never actually seen anyone buy ice cream from it...interesting or shady? Could go either way.

–The VietHoa grocery market. What, you’ve never bought gelatin in a can?

The City:

–Free brewery tours! Woo!!

–The Milwaukee Public Market. It may be posh, but you can find some really good deals.

–$1 tickets to see the Brewers. So what if you have to get there 2 hours early and your view is obstructed? Big deal. It’s $1. They might as well call it the volunteer special.

Okay, after reading it again, it wasn't THAT darn funny. But maybe it deserved a knee slap or two.